BURN ONE

It always seems to happen around this time of year. Like my brother in law- St. John, the inventor of the "SOJKA" a door unlocker and the "SOJKA II" a plastic thingy that keeps the gas nozzle pumping, while you stay snug in your vehicle, smoking your cigarette- I get ideas for things to sell. Admittedly, mine lean towards the esotheric, nonetheless I always think they are really good ideas. HOLY lgm water, cigars and honey was one such idea. I still think it's a good idea, but in the process of failing miserably, I realized one very important thing. I'm no businessman. I've always known this, but for some reason in the throes of my "idea" hardon I forget. Before you know it I'm 30k in the hole and I have a lot of unfolded boxes on the porch.
So this time I'm going to avoid that part. Sure, I want to make money. This is a money idea, as opposed to an art idea. But, when it comes to making money, I've finally realized that so-called "money idea" might as well be an art idea in my case. But enough of that. Check it out! My idea is to sell a dollar burning kit. Like those little extreme unction kits priests carry around in case some poor sap jumps out a window or swallows a chicken bone, this kit would also admit you to The Church of the Little Green Man congregation as a lifetime member.(It's an easy church to get into. Just try getting out.)
I'm thinking that the kit would contain a match, a dollar bill, and a little labeled bottle to keep the ashes in. That's it. Put it in a box and sell it for say $5. If anyone but me did this it would sell like hotcakes. People would be lining up to give them as gifts. It's timely, it's witty AND it's green. Thank God I know better than to put any effort into packaging this idea. In the past I'd be going to the bank to get crisp ones and cruising Canal St. for cheap bottles. In the end the packaging would cost $6 and I would go broke AGAIN! But don't let me stop you from burning one at home. And feel free to send me one. Bless the LGM.